Daughters
by Jacinda
Summary: She never thought that her past would wind up sleeping in the guest bedroom. He would have never guessed that at sixteen years old she was pregnant. (NS) - FIN
1. Nadine's POV: Biology

I spent so many years wondering where I came from. I spent years looking in the mirror examining my features trying to piece together what my parents might have looked like. I was always acutely aware that I was adopted. My brown hair and brown eyes are starkly different from the blonde hair and blue eyes of my parents and my sisters. When I was sixteen, my parents sat me down to tell me that I was adopted. I think I shocked them by saying that I already knew. I asked them if they knew who my biological parents are; my adoptive parents just shook their heads. They told me in two years I can open my adoption file to find the answers that I'd secretly been searching for. They reminded me that the answers might not be the comfort that I was imagining that they would be. I just wanted to know why I was being raised by someone else. That's the only question I really had.

I grew up in a good home. I took ballet and played soccer. I played in piano recitals, and I was always in the school plays. I had three older sisters to teach me about boys, makeup, and fashion. I grew up a very happy girl. I hid my desire to find the people that created me. My parents and my sisters didn't have any idea that there was a part of me that needed to know the people that created me.

Before I even turned eighteen, I would type my name into the internet to see if someone was looking for me. I had good intentions, but I didn't even have a last name to work with. I had no idea what the name on my birth certificate was. My adoptive parents had kept all that information hidden from me. As far as they were concerned, I was always going to be Nadine Keating.

On my eighteenth birthday, I went to the courthouse. I asked the lady behind the desk for a copy of my adoption certificate. My understanding of government red tape was rudimentary because I didn't realize it would take ten to fifteen days for me to receive a simple document.

My adoptive parents commented that I had become sullen. I never told them about my trip to the courthouse. They had always tried to protect me. I knew that I was lucky that I had someone to protect me. My demeanor had been edgy during my thirteen day wait.

The name on the adoption certificate didn't mean much to me without a face to put them to. I was the daughter of Sara Sidle and blank. I didn't know what the hell blank meant. The adoption record said that Sara was sixteen years old. I was born in Boston general hospital. She was a student. The documents said that Sara Sidle was not financially capable of taking care of me. I wished that the court documents said if she cried when she gave me away.

My internet searches lead me to Las Vegas. I snuck away in the night leaving a cryptic note for my adoptive parents. I boarded a plane from Hartford, Connecticut to Las Vegas, Nevada. I was fascinated by the lights. The lights seemed to illuminate the barren desert around the oasis. I had never seen something so gaudy, but beautiful all at the same time.

I had only her place of employment. I carried with me a small bag of clothes and toiletries and three hundred dollars. I came searching for answers. I came to find out who 'blank' was.

The receptionist smiled at me when I asked if Sara Sidle is working. She said that Sara was working in the lab. The receptionist asked who I was. I told her that I'm family. The receptionist smiled and told me that she didn't realize Sara had any family.

The woman that approached me didn't look like she was ever a sixteen year old that gave up a child. The woman that approached looked so much like me that it's scary. I have her nose, her complexion, and her height.

"Can I help you?" she asked as she stood in front of me. She wore a lab coat over dress slacks and a casual shirt. She looked so much younger than her thirty-four years.

"I'm Nadine. I'm your daughter," I said. My voice shook. It was the first time that I realized that I really was in Las Vegas, and I really was standing in front of the woman that gave birth to me.

She took a step back and examined me. Sara looked terrified of me. The terror seemed to fade to surprise and shock. She looked like she might be trying to decide whether to embrace me or run away.

"Wow. I never thought that . . . wow. Come with me. Let's go somewhere a little more private," Sara said as she ushered me into the core of the building. We walked past rooms full of machines. I looked around curiously.

"How did you get here?" Sara asked as she ushered me into a conference room.

"The red eye out of Hartford," I replied. That wasn't the first question that I expected her to ask.

"Do your parents know where you are?" Sara asked. I wanted to tell her that she knew where I was . . . that was good enough.

"I left them a note. They would kill me if they knew I was here," I replied with a laugh, "I just need to know why. I need to know who my father is."

"I didn't think that I would ever see you again. I was young and scared. Your father date raped me. You don't want to know him. I know you think it might answer your questions, but you don't want to know him. You are better by not knowing him," she rambled nervously.

"He raped you?" I asked shocked. I was under the assumption that she was probably a young, careless kid when I was conceived. I never imagined that I was born out of a crime.

"Nadine . . . he was a bad man," Sara said with downcast eyes, "You should call your parents to let them know that you are okay."

"I'm sorry, Sara," I replied. I was tempted to call her mom, but I knew that was inappropriate. I really, really wanted to call her mom. I wanted to be of some comfort to her. I wanted to be like the mothers and daughters on the sitcoms. If the mother cried, the daughter was there to tell her mother that all they really needed was each other. I couldn't do that because I didn't have her and she didn't have me.

"That was years ago. It's almost like ancient history," Sara replied with an unconvincing smile, "You're a pretty girl."

"I look a lot like you," I commented. She nodded her head.

"Do you need a place to stay until you catch your flight home?" Sara asked. I nodded. She gently smiled at me despite the fact she examined me like I was a ticking time bomb. I felt guilty for coming back into her life. My mom always told me to call before stopping over at a friend's house. It was good etiquette. I probably should have called before hopping a plane to my biological mother's home.

"When do you fly home?" Sara asked. She was wringing her hands. It was something that I did when I was nervous.

"The day after tomorrow. My parents will probably be on the next flight out here," I replied.

"Your eighteenth birthday wasn't too long along. Thank God you didn't do this when you were underage," Sara said with a sigh of relief. I secretly was overjoyed that she remembered my birthday.

"Three weeks ago," I clarified.

"You graduated from high school not too long ago," Sara stated. I was surprised that she was so in tune with what was going on in my life.

"Valedictorian," I replied. She smiled. It wasn't the fearful smile that was plastered on her face just moments ago. Sara might have even looked like she was proud of my achievements.

"Let me go see if I can get the rest of tonight off," Sara said as she abruptly stood up and left the room.

I sat in the small room looking at through the glass walls. It was so sterile. It was reminiscent of a hospital. It felt cold and impersonal. People walked by the rooms and stared in, but they didn't seem affected by the contents of the rooms. I didn't like this place. I wondered how Sara possibly could.


	2. Nick's POV: Safety

"So she just hopped a plane to Vegas from Connecticut?" I asked a second time. Sara didn't hear me the first time; she was too busy pacing the length of the auto shop.

"She just hopped a plane to Vegas. What do I do, Nick?" Sara asked. She looked heart-broken, confused, and angry all at the same time.

"Has she called her parents?" I asked. Sara shot me a dirty look. I knew what she was thinking. Sara was one of her parents.

"No, I told her she could stay with us," Sara blurted out. Five minutes ago, I had no idea that Sara had a daughter. Sara came into the auto shop and spit out a long explanation of how she had been a teenage mother. The explanation wasn't really long, but she said 'I'm sorry' so many times that it felt longer. I dropped the wrench that I was holding. Warrick high-tailed it out of the room. I knew Sara had secrets, but I wasn't expecting a bomb-shell to fall out of an otherwise peaceful sky.

"Oh, are you sure that's a good idea?" I asked.

"She's eighteen. There is no way that she's going to stay in a hotel in Vegas. How could you even suggest something like that?" Sara replied.

"I'm sorry. I just don't want you to get hurt when she leaves," I replied, but I think it might have already been too late to keep Sara from getting hurt. I hadn't realized that I suggested that Nadine stay in a hotel.

"Grissom said that I could leave early. I was only working on cold cases anyways," Sara replied, "You should meet her before I leave. I don't want her to get freaked out if some guy walks into the house in the wee hours of the morning."

I nodded. I didn't know what else to say. Sara's explanation sounded like only the bare bones version of the events of eighteen years ago. I followed her back into the lab. The girl sitting in the conference room looked exactly like what I thought a teenage Sara might look like. She had long brown hair and long, lean legs. Her features were sharp just like Sara's. There was no doubt in my mind that this girl was Sara's daughter. I just wondered who the father was. Sara neglected to mention that.

"Nadine, this Nick. He's my . . .," Sara looked at me confused. Our relationship had interesting dividing lines. We began as friends that accidentally slept together after five too many drinks, but recently, it felt like there was something more. We moved in together and began testing the waters of monogamy, trust, and fidelity. It was a challenge to say the least. It was hard to teach two fiercely independent thirty-somethings how to rely on each other.

"I'm Sara's boyfriend," I replied quickly. I think I might have replied a little too quickly. Nadine looked up at me and began to assess me. It was the same way that Sara assessed people. Nadine smiled nervously.

"We live together. Is it going to be okay if he's in the house too?" Sara asked cautiously.

"You ask like I'm being given a choice," Nadine replied with an arched eyebrow. It made me laugh, but Sara shot me a look that would kill. It was the same smart mouth that Sara had.

"I'll pick up breakfast in the morning," I said as I ran a hand down Sara's back. Sara nearly jumped a mile into the air when I touched her.

"It's okay. It's not like I've never heard about sex," Nadine quipped. Sara looked like she much just pass out. I laughed.

"Okay, let's pretend that I didn't hear that," Sara said with a sigh. She was an intense shade of red. I never pictured Sara as a mother, but in those few moments, I could see that maybe she would have been a natural at that role.

"I'll see you two in the morning. Nadine, call your parents," I replied before I even realized that I was giving the young lady instructions. I've always wanted to be a father. Despite my bachelor ways, I always wondered what it would be like to live the life that my parents did. I've always wondered what it would be like to have kids playing in the backyard while I sat on the porch watching them.

I watched Sara leave with Nadine. Although Sara looked horribly uncomfortable, she probably felt some sense of relief that her daughter was well taken care of. Nadine looked like a nice young girl. I wondered if Sara ever looked as happy as Nadine did. I still wondered who Nadine's father was. I wondered what happened to Sara at age fifteen.

The night dragged on for what seemed like forever. There were whispers in the room whenever I walked in. Warrick looked at me suspiciously to try to figure out what I was thinking. I wasn't even sure what I was thinking. I wondered if I should just let history be history.

I was glad to go home. I walked through the door with a bag of bagels in my hand and coffee for Sara. Sara was sitting on the couch. It hadn't looked like she fell asleep. She looked emotionally drained.

"Hey," I said as I sat down next to her.

"I was sixteen years old. I had just started school at Harvard. I was lonely, so when this guy from my introductory physics class asked me out for dinner, I said yes. I said yes even though he was in his sophomore year . . . that made him what nineteen or twenty. I should have known he was trouble when he handed me a beer the minute he picked me up from my dorm," Sara said slowly.

"I could get As in school, but I had no understanding of relationships. I thought they would be just as easy as calculus," Sara said. I almost laughed at her comment because she was the only person I knew that thought calculus was easy.

"It's okay," I whispered as I pulled her closer to me, "It's the past."

"Well, the past is sleeping in the guest bedroom. Nick, I didn't set out to get pregnant. I said no. I screamed no, but no one in his frat house bothered to figure out why I was screaming," Sara said emotionlessly as the tears poured down her cheeks. It explained a lot about Sara. It explained why Sara refused to go my college reunion with me. I had told her that she would get to meet my frat brothers. I wondered why Sara looked disgusted with the proposition. It made so much more sense now.

"It's okay. You're safe now. Nadine grew up in a good home. She looks like a happy kid," I replied.

"I told her what her father did to me. What do I say to her to make sure that she doesn't try to find him? I don't want him to hurt her . . . he's dangerous," Sara rambled as she collapsed into my arms.

"You told her the truth. That's the best you can do. She's obviously going to do what she wants to," I replied.

"I don't want her to get hurt by him," Sara cried.

We sat silently in the living room. I didn't know what to say to make her feel better. Sara didn't know what to tell Nadine to protect her. I was proud of how brave Sara was. I hadn't expected her to be so stoic. I hadn't expected Sara to revel herself to me in an in way that is so much more intimate than most of what she tells me.

"Good morning," Nadine said as she padded into the living room. Sara looked up and smiled. I couldn't imagine the relief of knowing that her daughter was safe.

"Good morning. Go call your parents," Sara insisted as she thrust her cell phone at Nadine. Nadine did as told. Her conversation with her parents was terse. Nadine swore up and down that it was all her idea to go out to Vegas to meet Sara. She kept telling her parents that she was safe . . . that Sara and I were making sure that she didn't get into any trouble. Sara even told Nadine to be a little more respectful when she told her mother to shut up. Sara talked to her mother. Sara reassured the woman that Nadine would be on a plane home tomorrow morning. Sara promised that Nadine would be kept out of trouble. Sara apologized for the whole mess. Nadine apologized to her mother and promised to be good. She said that she was sorry for scaring them.

"I'm sorry my mom freaked out on you," Nadine said to Sara as she hung up the cell phone.

"You're lucky I'm not in charge of you. You'd be locked in your room until you are twenty-one," Sara replied.

"That's nothing. Mom said that I'm grounded until I'm eighty," Nadine replied, "I'm really sorry. When I got the adoption record, it didn't say anything about my biological father."

"Just promise me that you will never get involved with him," Sara replied sternly.

"I promise. I'm hungry," Nadine said.

"I brought home bagels," I said as I retreated into the kitchen. I was glad to get out of the tense environment. I could hear Sara and Nadine talking. I prayed that come tomorrow Sara would be okay . . . that Nadine would be okay. I wondered if either of them would be able to say good-bye.


	3. Sara's POV: Little Girls

I had a million questions that I wanted to ask her. I had a million questions that I was terrified to ask her. I couldn't believe how seeing this beautiful young woman made me regret what I thought was the best decision I ever made. Nadine was becoming the woman that I wished I could have been. She was happy and free despite the wondering and the secrets regarding her birth. I found myself jealous of her because at age eighteen, I was depressed and alone. I spent so many years depressed and alone.

I watched her tell Nick about how she was going to be going to college at U-Conn in a month and a half. Nadine was going to be studying science. She wanted to be a doctor or a vet. I prayed that she would enter a profession where she saw only the best of people. I didn't want her to become hardened the way that I was hardened.

I wasn't surprised that Nick was enjoying Nadine's presence. Several times he had expressed the desire to have a family. I never told him why I was terrified to have a child. I never told him that I had a child ripped out of my arms when I was only a child. I never told him that no one ever knew that I was pregnant. I was horribly underweight. I wore baggy clothes so the blue-bloods at Harvard didn't treat me any worse than they already did.

Last night, Nadine had asked me if I ever had any more children and if I had ever married. I told her that I never met a man that treated me decently until I met Nick. She looked embarrassed for asking those questions. The truth was that I was terrified to have another child. I was terrified that it would be at the wrong time with the wrong man. I was terrified that for some reason anther child would be ripped from my arms. Nick only began to understand my fears this morning.

Grissom called me in the middle of the day to see if I would be coming back to work in the evening. I told him that I needed the time off to spend with Nadine. Grissom said that he suspected that. He had already talked to Catherine about making sure that Nick could also have the night off. Grissom asked me how I was feeling. I told him that I was doing okay. I lied to him like I lied to Grissom so many times before. I didn't want Nadine to go. I didn't want to have to lose her again, but that was the reality of the situation. There was no way that reality was going to change just because I wanted it to.

I called Nadine's adoptive parents again. I told them that Nadine was safe. I apologized again for the whole mess. Beth said that Nadine had a mind of her own. Her father said Nadine had been searching for me since her sixteenth birthday. They said they didn't blame me for their daughter's actions. I promised that I would make sure she got home safe. They thanked me. I would find out ten days later that they called the lab to see if it was safe for Nadine to be in Las Vegas with me. Beth and Roger obviously remembered me as a scared young woman. They probably remembered me as the girl that cried as she told the judge that she wanted to terminate her rights as a parent. They knew only pieces of the story.

Nick took Nadine out for ice cream while I slept on the couch. He had warned me not to get too attached, but I watched him grow attached to my daughter. He treated her with the respect that he showed me. Nick opened doors for her. Nadine said that she really liked Nick.

Nadine was a perceptive girl. She asked me if I loved Nick. I told her that I tried very hard to love him as much as he loved me. Nadine asked me if I was happy. I told her that a lot of the time I wasn't happy. She asked me why. I told her that without Nick, I didn't have anyone else in the world. She asked about my parents. I lied and told her both were dead. I told Nadine they died when I was still a teenager. I could see the tears in her eyes. Nadine told me that she had two grandparents that were as old as the dinosaurs. She began to see that I was broken woman. I was clinging on to Nick because he was the only lifesaver I had ever known.

Nadine asked me about my job. She asked me if I like literature classes. I told her that I hated them. She laughed and said that she hated them too. I knew her. Without having her as my own, I knew her. The biology that made her a Sidle was so much stronger than the environment that made her a Keating. Nadine was lucky that she got only the good genes.

When night fell and Nadine realized that in twelve hours she would be on a plane home, she grew quiet. She said several times that she would like to visit. My only request was that next time she lets her parents know where she is going to be. Nadine promised that there would be a next time.

As Nick snored softly through the movie we rented, I gave Nadine the only piece of advice that I had really learned in my years on earth. I told Nadine to always love herself. I told Nadine to always respect her body. I told her not to be like me. I made her promise to always love herself before she loved others. She nodded as if she really understood what I was saying, but I knew it was impossible. These lessons were learned only by destructive behavior and self-loathing. I didn't ever want her to learn these lessons first hand.

I watched Nadine sleep. I wondered what would have happened if I kept Nadine so many years ago. I probably would have never completed my degree at Harvard. I probably would have never met Gil Grissom in graduate school. I would have never gone to Las Vegas to investigate the Gribbs case. I would have never met Nick. I wondered if I could have been a good mother to her. I doubted that. I wasn't ready. I was still reeling from the loss of my father and the incarceration of my mother.

I remembered the moment that the doctor handed Nadine to me. I remembered how tiny she was. I remembered how soft her brown hair was. I remembered how tiny her fingernails were. She was so perfect. I didn't want to let her go, but the lady from child services kept telling me to say good-bye to the little girl. I tried to not let go of Nadine, but they insisted.

I let the tears roll down my face as I watched the credits roll across the television screen. Nadine was such a beautiful girl. She was so smart. It was comforting to know that she grew into a wonderful young woman, but it would make it so much harder to watch her board a plane tomorrow morning.

The morning came much too soon. The drive to the airport was much too short. We all sat silently in Nick's Denali. I didn't know what to say. I never did know how to say good-bye. We stood outside the security check point. Nadine thanked me for taking her in for the last two days. I thanked Nadine for finding me. I told her that I was proud of the woman that she was becoming. Nadine hugged me and told me she would come to visit. I cried when I told her that she was always welcome here. Her brown hair clung to her tear stained cheeks. Nadine hugged Nick, and he told her to have a safe flight. She turned around and waved at me as she walked through the security checkpoint.

I collapsed into Nick's arms. I had no idea how I got home. I just remember Nick calling Grissom to say that I wasn't in any condition to be at work. I remember crying in his arms for hours. I cried for a little girl that I never got to watch grow up. I cried for myself . . . a young woman that never got to be a little girl.


	4. Letters I

We write letters. We send emails and exchange occasional telephone calls. Nadine talked about coming out to Vegas over her spring break. I tell her to worry about her fall semester classes before she begins to worry about the spring. Nick talked about getting her a cell phone so she can keep in closer contact to us.

She's called me 'mom' a few times on accident. Nadine has never asked about her father again. I'm thankful that she doesn't want to know anymore about him than I have already told her. I found myself thinking about her on a daily basis. When I saw a pair of cute earrings in a store front window, I bought them for her. I thought they would look nice on her.

_October 24, 2005_

_Dear Sara,_

_How are you and Nick? I'm doing good. My classes have been going okay, but I have a British literature class this semester that I really hate. I have a choir concert this weekend. My parents are going to record it, so I can send you a copy. Were you ever in choir? It's something that's not really important, but I was wondering about it last night._

_Tell Nick that I say hi. I know . . . I'm going to go study right now._

_Love,_

_Nadine_

_October 31, 2005_

_Dear Nadine,_

_Nick and I watched the choir concert Roger and Beth emailed to us. You looked beautiful. It was a beautiful concert. My mother, your grandmother, used to sing when she was cooking supper in the kitchen. I always would sing with her, but my voice wasn't as soothing as hers. Your grandmother used to play the piano and sing to me and my brother. We didn't have a television when we were growing up. Those were some of my happiest childhood memories._

_I'm sure that you will do good in your Brit Lit class. When I was in college, I had to take one of those classes. I remember how boring it was. Good luck on your midterms, kiddo._

_Nick is watching the U-Conn football game. We always look for you in the crowd. Be careful._

_Love,_

_Sara_

_November 27, 2005_

_Dear Sara and Nick,_

_Happy Thanksgiving. My mom made me help with the turkey this year. I think I was instrumental in burning it. I must get it from you because everyone else in my family is a master chef. I really hate cooking . . . just as much as I hate Brit Lit. _

_My midterms went okay. I never think I do as well as I do on exams. My chemistry and physics classes are going really well. I love my chemistry lab. My professor has talked to me about switching my major to chemistry. He says that I'm a natural at it. _

_Do you have any pictures of your parents? I just want to see what they look like. I'd like to put a face to your memories. _

_Love,_

_Kiddo_

_PS Tell Nick that I go to as many football games as I can. I always wave at the camera just in case you two are watching._

_December 1, 2005_

_Dear Kiddo,_

_I'm sorry to hear about the turkey. Nick and I have to order out every Thanksgiving because I severely burnt the tofu turkey last year. Don't tell Nick that it wasn't a real turkey. The only person in your biological family that was a good cook was your grandmother. She single handedly ran a bed and breakfast for years. She could cook just about anything. Unfortunately for Nick, I'm better at ordering take out than making a meal from scratch._

_Here's a few pictures of my family. I've sent you pictures of my parents and my older brother. Sam, your uncle, lives somewhere in New York. He is a painter. In high school, he painted murals in some of the grade schools around San Francisco. I haven't heard from him in years. He's always led a crazy life._

_I've always loved chemistry. Just take classes that you are interested in. I'd be proud of you even if you were a garbage woman or a politician. It's more important to me that you are happy. _

_Nick wants to know if you are going to go to the U-Conn basketball games. He's still deciding whether or not to get the college basketball cable package. Take care of yourself._

_Love,_

_S_

_December 15, 2005_

_Dear Sara and Nick,_

_Nick emailed me last night to tell me that you have been sick lately. I hope that you are feeling better soon. He wants me to tell you to take a few days off work to get some sleep. I'm really impressed that he made you home-made vegetable broth. I didn't take him for a Mr. Domestic. Just try to feel better soon._

_My final exams are going okay. I'm excited to have winter break soon. There's already tons of snow on the ground. My parents are taking me skiing in Vermont after Christmas. I'll be thinking about you and Nick. I hope you guys have a good Christmas. I'll try to call you two on Christmas. _

_My roommate says that I look a lot like my grandmother. She's really beautiful. I wish I could have met her._

_Feel better. Hope you like the Christmas presents._

_Love,_

_Kiddo_

_December 20, 2005_

_Dear Kiddo,_

_We got some good news for you. Nick took me to the doctor yesterday. It turns out that I was wrong about having the flu. We're pregnant. You should see Nick. I've never seen him so happy. He's already picking out baby names even though we have seven and a half months to figure that stuff out. You are the first person that we've told._

_I know you did good on your exams. You are a smart girl . . . always remember that. Grades don't mean a thing. The only thing that is important is that you are happy._

_Thank you for the picture. You look so beautiful. Nick and I framed it and put it up in the living room. Nick loved the hat. You're turning him into quite the U-Conn fan. He's been religiously watching the basketball games. _

_I hope you have fun skiing. Be careful._

_Love,_

_S and N_

_December 27, 2005_

_Dear Sara and Nick,_

_Congratulations! That is so cool. I've never had a little brother and sister. I made my parents promise me that I could go out to Vegas after the baby is born. Mom is going to teach me to knit, so I can make a baby blanket. I was thinking about making the blanket orange . . . I've never liked the pink or baby blue. I can't picture you liking those colors either. _

_Thank you for the Christmas presents. The pearl necklace is so pretty. I wore it on Christmas. I told my sisters about you and Nick when my family got together for Christmas. They can't believe how much I look like you. I'm really lucky that I found you. _

_My friend is going to dress up in a chicken costume for the next U-Conn game. He says that it will probably get us on TV. I promise I'll be waving to you and Nick._

_Love you and my baby sibling,_

_Kiddo_

_January 20, 2006_

_Dear Kiddo,_

_We saw you on TV last night. Your friend is quiet the entertainer. Those pearls looked nice on you . . . with the U-Conn sweatshirt. I'm so glad that you found me._

_I'm sure that your baby sibling is going to love having you visit. Nick and I are starting to look at houses. We were going to look for something bigger than we have now, so you always have a room to stay in when you come to visit. Nick and I want you to be a part of the baby's life . . . we want you to be part of our lives. I know I can't make up for eighteen years, but I'm here if you ever need me._

_Study hard. Tell the chicken-man thank you for me._

_Love you,_

_Sara and Nick_

_PS Orange is one of my favorite colors._

* * *

Author's Note: The chicken suit thing is actually a true story. That's how my friends and I used to get on television when we were in college or when we went to professional sports games.

Let me know if you guys want more chapters. I have plans for one more (letters surrounding the months leading up to the due date then abrief visit from Nadine), but I'll write more if you all want more. Thank you all for the reviews! -Jac


	5. Letters II

_February 1, 2006_

_Dear Sara and Nick,_

_Congrats on the house. It looks really pretty. _

_Thank you for the open-ended plane ticket. I'm going to be doing research in the Chemistry department this summer. I've already told the professor I'm researching with that I'm going to Vegas at the end of July to meet my new brother or sister. I've started working on the baby blanket. I'm not too good at knitting, so I'll probably need the next five months to finish it._

_How are you feeling? Every time I try to call you, Nick says that you just got done throwing up. Are you sure that you and the baby are okay? When you were pregnant with me, did I make you that sick too? When you go in for your ultrasound next month, please, please, please send me a copy of the picture._

_Feel better. _

_Love you,_

_Kiddo_

_PS My spring break is in mid-April. Is it okay if I come out to Vegas?_

_February 14, 2006_

_Dear Kiddo,_

_You are more than welcome to come out to Vegas anytime you want. Just give Nick and me a few days notice so we can take some time off of work. Nick painted your room last weekend. We can't decide what color to paint the nursery. _

_I remember every second of being pregnant with you. I was so sick during my first trimester. I took primarily night classes at school. You were a beautiful baby. I remember you kicking a lot. It was the weirdest feeling. It always made me smile no matter how sad I was. _

_Don't worry so much about me. Nick already does that full-time. I'm sure that the morning sickness will get better as I get further into my second trimester. I'll send you a copy of the ultrasound next month._

_Study hard, Ms. Honor Roll. Don't ever forget how proud of you I am._

_Love you,_

_S and N_

_February 28, 2006_

_Dear Nick and Sara,_

_I'm going to worry about you until I see that you are okay. I already booked my flight for April 14th. My mom is going to drive me to the airport in Hartford. My flight gets into Vegas at 3:30 pm. Let me know if I should take a cab to the house or to the lab._

_You were really pretty when you were a teenager. I put that picture of you and me in a frame. It's on my desk. I look at it a lot when I miss you and Nick. I miss you guys as much as I miss my parents. I think I'm really lucky to have two sets of parents that love me. I know you and Nick aren't married, but he treats us both really well. He's going to be a great dad to the baby. I'm looking at the picture right now._

_Feel better. Tell Nick that Chicken-man and I are going to the U-Conn game on Saturday. I'll wave to both of you._

_Love you,_

_Kiddo_

_March 15, 2006_

_Dear Kiddo,_

_Here's the picture of your little sister. I can't believe how tiny she is . . . I can't believe how big I'm getting. I'm feeling a lot better. I promise you that the pregnancy is going to be fine. _

_Nick and I miss you. He taped the U-Conn game, so I could watch you wave at us over and over again. Nick and I have been talking to about planning a wedding after the baby is born. We've been talking about planning something during your spring break, so you could come to the wedding. _

_I miss you so much. Tell Chicken-man thank you for getting you on TV again._

_Love you so much,_

_S and N_

_PS Nick is going to pick you up at the airport. Just give us a call, so we have your gate number and flight number._

_March 30, 2006_

_Dear Sara and Nick,_

_Did Nick ask you to marry him? You've got to tell me what he did. He asked me a few weeks ago if I thought you would marry him. I told him that he better ask you because he's already a great step-dad._

_She's so cute. She's curled up like a little shrimp. I put her picture in a frame on my desk. I'm almost done with the baby blanket. I work on my knitting while I watch CourtTV. _

_I'm taking a forensic science class next year. I think what you and Nick do is really cool. I've been watching a lot of those shows on TV lately. I'm not really sure if I want to be a doctor anymore. I've been thinking about talking a few classes in criminal justice._

_Chicken-man and I are going to the March Madness Game on Saturday. We're making signs this time. Make sure to tape the game._

_Love you,_

_Kiddo_

_PS Have you started to think of names for the baby?_

_April 5, 2006_

_Dear Kiddo,_

_I can't believe you and Nick had that all planned out. How long were you two planning out the proposal? Say thank you to Chicken-man for getting you on TV with my 'proposal' sign. Nick picked out a beautiful ring. It was perfect. _

_Nick and I are looking forward to seeing you in just a few days. The baby is looking forward to saying hi to you. She's started to kick. _

_We'll see you in a few days._

_Love you so much,_

_S and N_

_April 30, 2006_

_Dear Sara and Nick,_

_Spring Break went way too fast. I really didn't want to go back to Connecticut. I had so much fun with you, Nick, and the baby. So have you and Nick narrowed down the plethora names you guys like. Remember only a first name and a middle name – I can't believe how indecisive you two are! I still like Elizabeth Grace. I think Libby would be such a cute nickname. I know you don't want me to focus on this stuff – I promise I'm not going to run out and get pregnant, so I can name the baby._

_I told my mom all about how Nick let me spend a day at the crime lab with him. I had so much fun. I'm thinking about taking a short course in forensic chemistry this summer, but I don't want to miss out on any time with my little sister._

_Tell Nick that college baseball games are rarely televised. Chicken-man and I are on hiatus until the fall._

_Love you so much,_

_Kiddo_

_May 15, 2006_

_Dear Kiddo,_

_The baby and I are doing great. We are both completely healthy. I've enclosed a copy of the latest ultrasound. She's going to be a big girl. I seem to get bigger and bigger every day. _

_Nick and I are still working on baby names. Elizabeth Grace is still on the table. The latest ones are Abigail Elise and Jacquelyn Elise. Let us know what you think. _

_Don't worry about getting to Vegas to be here for the delivery. School comes first. Your education is so important, Nadine. Don't you ever forget about that. _

_Good luck on final exams._

_Love you,_

_S and N_

_June 15, 2006_

_Dear Sara and Nick,_

_Nick told me that you are on bed rest for the last month of your pregnancy. Are you and the baby really okay? Nick didn't really tell me much about what was going on. He told me not to worry. You have to tell me if anything is wrong._

_I've been working in the chemistry lab fulltime for the last few weeks. I'm working on isolating the active site of an endogenous ribozyme. I tried to explain it to Nick when I called last week, but he said that you would understand it so much better than him. It's really exciting. My professor is working on the crystal structure of the protein. It's really cool. I'm having so much fun that I'm going to change my major to chemistry. I think I might do a minor in forensic science. _

_Call me as soon as the baby is born! _

_I love you,_

_Kiddo_

_June 30, 2006_

_Dear Kiddo,_

_I am bored out of my mind. I didn't realize how awful being confined to bed or the rocking chair would be. I think I'm driving Nick crazy because I keep on coming up with things that still need to be done before Libby is born. You should have seen him try to put the crib together. He ended up calling Warrick to help him. They both sat and swore at the crib for two hours before I read the directions to them. We are both getting really excited about the baby coming._

_Just find a career that is going to make you happy. That's all that I care about. I want you to be happy. _

_Nick promised that he will call you as soon as I go into labor. We have your dorm room, lab, and cell phone numbers on the refrigerator._

_I love you,_

_S and N_

_PS I've been having Braxton-Hicks contractions, so it's probably going to be soon._

Nadine's POV:

Like my mom, my suitcase was packed and sitting next to the door of my dorm room. I was busy in the lab running my samples through the PCR to get a good DNA fingerprint of the active site. My professor walked over to my fume hood and said that my dad was on the phone. Nick wasn't my dad, but he acted like on in every sense of the word. Nick told me that Sara was in labor. I talked to Sara briefly before another contraction started. Nick had already booked my flight.

With my professor's blessing, I ran out of the lab to my dorm. I called my adoptive parents and told them that I was going to Vegas to meet my baby sister. They told me to call when I got there. They were surprisingly support of my relationship with Sara and Nick . . . probably because they always taught me that family was important. I called a cab and nervously waited at the curb in front of my dorm.

The flight seemed to take so much longer than it normally did. I was fidgeting so badly that the woman next to me asked if I was okay. I told her that my baby sister was being born. I told her that I was in a hurry to get home. I had never called Vegas home before, but Nick and Sara made it feel like a home.

Warrick was waiting by the luggage carousel. I grabbed my bag and ran over to him. I asked him if Libby was born yet. Warrick said that Sara was still in labor when he checked in fifteen minutes ago. I told him to hurry up. I really wanted to be there to meet Libby. She after all was one of the only people to share my genetics.

I was out of the SUV before Warrick even put it into park. He struggled to keep up with me as we went up to the labor and delivery floor. Nick met me at the door. Sara had elected to have a natural delivery. He was worried because she was in her fourteenth hour of labor. He asked me to reason with her.

I walked over to the side of her bed. Sweat dripped off her face. I held a washcloth to her head. She smiled weakly.

"Hey, you got here in time for the show," Sara whispered. I began to panic. She looked tired and dehydrated. Her skin was the whitest white that I had ever seen.

"You should really take the epidural. You look like shit, Mom," I said.

"Don't swear," Sara immediately corrected, "Don't worry. Libby and I are hanging on. I gave birth to you naturally. If I could do it at age sixteen, I can do it at age thirty-five."

"Nick's out there freaking out," I replied.

"I know. He was in here freaking out just a few minutes ago," Sara replied with a smile that rapidly turned to a grimace. She clinched my hand as she tried to breathe through the contraction. I held her hand tightly and told her to breathe. Before I knew it, Nick was at her other side telling her to do her Lamaze breathing. Sara didn't look like she was sold on the Lamaze thing.

Twenty minutes later, the nurses were showing Nick and me how to gown and glove up. We entered the delivery room before the nurses did. Nick told Sara that the doctors all went home . . . he said that he would have to deliver the baby. Sara's eyes got wide before she told him that that was the least funny thing she's ever heard. Elizabeth Grace was born thirty minutes later.

I sat with Libby in my arms. Sara was sleeping. Nick was on the telephone with his parents. I had already called my mom to tell her that I had a baby sister. I kissed Libby on the head. I wrapped her in the orange and white blanket I had knitted her. The colors were pale. It reminded me of a dreamsicle.

My world was perfect. My adoptive parents had said that the answers I searched for might not be comforting. The answers I found completed me. It gave me another family that loved me. It gave me a genetic connection to someone besides my mother. I knew at that moment . . . I was the luckiest girl in the world.

FIN

Author's Note: I think this might be the best way to end this story. I might consider writing a sequel later on it will probably be pure fluff about the new baby. Thank you all for the reviews!


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